Bad Shape

2010-08-23T13:01:00.001-07:00

Bride of Chucky!

2009-02-06T12:55:00.000-08:00

BABY LAUGH-A-LOT!

How'd you like this bitch for a drinkin' buddy?

2009-02-06T11:15:00.000-08:00

Work that GUNT!

2009-02-06T10:24:00.000-08:00

Check out this exercise video! A rolly-polly mammy in spandex replaces actual exercise techniques with really stupid dance moves!

I guess it makes sense that her class of geezers, cows and retards can't really get down to much more than a shoulder roll, or the AMAZING "pony".

I've been missing you...

2009-02-05T13:57:00.000-08:00

so...Watch this fat kid pretend to have sex with a pillow (based on the faux silk pattern, probably a pillow from his parents couch!)

Is that R.Kelly in the background? Does he think this is sexy? I mean, at 1:40 it looks as though he sticks his finger into his belly button, fingers around for shit, and then licks his fingers?

Well anyway, he gets hungry from all the humpin' at the end...if you can make it through!

Get your freak on - Watch more

Tracy Morgan has a pretty good schtick...

2009-01-05T01:26:00.000-08:00

And even if you don't think so, you have to admire his consistency.

little whore wants sweet daddy bear!

2008-12-14T13:18:00.000-08:00

BIG UPS TO KEVIN FOR SENDING ME THIS!

a friendly SLAP

2008-12-01T17:43:00.001-08:00

These are some HARD slaps.

Before there were blogs to slam Celebrities...

2008-11-24T22:42:00.001-08:00

Remember Stuttering John from Howard Stern? Dennis Pennis from the BBC? Who else these days has sincere contempt for celebrity culture and is not AFRAID of calling out a so called A-lister FACE TO FACE? The need for embarrassing celebrities has never been greater!

Sure, long before these bozo's there were tabloid writers and columnists like Liz Smith et al...but you know what - contemporary celebrity dissing via safe distance has reached a new level with blogging. You can say as many mean things about any celebrity with no repercussions from the safety of your laptop parked at Starbucks.

Do you think that fat bitch Perez Hilton would EVER have the balls to slam anyone face to face? He is too busy sucking expensive Call Boys cocks and fucking his dog to do much else than throw shit parties with shit musical guests and draw WindowsPaint cum drops on stolen paparazzi photos of celebrities. Boring.

Anyway here are some face to face celebrity slams from both pre-blog celebrity slammers Stuttering John and Dennis the Pennis.

2008-11-20T14:26:00.001-08:00

Now for the second part of my post.

Well you have heard of Gayface - an extremely gay looking face. But have you heard of Pedoface? It's a pretty awful and accusatory term I know AND after seeing almost every episode of To Catch a Predator I know that pedophiles and pervs come in all shapes, colors and sizes.

HOWEVER, every once in awhile I see a face that give me the pedo-hebejebes. A face that just looks perverted - you know? For instance, the diddler character in Todd Solondz opus HAPPINESS was cast perfectly. The actor playing the Pedo HAS Pedoface. See for yourself.

"there's blood in my b.m"

It's something in the eyes, something smushy in and feminine about the features. Well the reason I brought this up is that the much beloved Mr. Rogers as mentioned earlier had pedoface as well - being the host of a childrens show just adds to the creepiness (and very Todd Solondz-y).

Below is a picture of Mr. Rogers and others who I believe suffer from the epidemic known as Pedoface.

MCFEELY AND THE THE SLUTTY GORILLA

2008-11-20T13:32:00.000-08:00

Remember the phenomenon that was Koko the Gorilla!? She was trained to communicate using American Sign Language and knows over 1,000 signs, and can understand over 2,000 words spoken in English.
(Fun Facts: According to Wikipedia Koko was involved in three sexual harrassment lawsuits by former trainers. Apparently Koko likes NIPPLES, alot.

Anyway, when your a celebrity other celebrities want to meet you - so Koko has gotten the opportunity to grab the crotches of stars like Robin Williams, William Shatner and Leonardo DiCaprio.

Her most notable celebrity friend is none other than the late, Fred Mcfeely (for real) Rogers otherwise known as MR. ROGERS.

Here is a lovely photo of their encounter.

And some lovely video footage of Mr. Rogers being cradled by the horny Gorilla lady.

Another addition to my CRAZY LADY posts.

2008-11-15T01:17:00.000-08:00

I have no idea what is going on here? Spiritual sing-a-long, the all seeing eye, filthy hippies? I don't know. She gives me the hebejebes.

Senator Robert Byrd loves the term...BARBARIC!

2008-11-15T00:13:00.001-08:00

According to wikipedia, Robert Byrd is the oldest living member of the United States Senate (he is 91 years old!). He is also a former member of the Klu Klux Klan!? However he claims to have long since changed his views, and openly supported Obama in the past election.

He is also often spotted by cameras as asleep during Senate debates.

Dog Fuckers...

2008-11-02T09:10:00.000-08:00

In a documentary about Beastiality two women describe fucking dogs. Seriously.
(around the 2:20 mark)

Zwarte Piet

2008-10-30T15:56:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow everyone is dressing up, so in the spirit of dressing up check out the Zwarte Piet out of the Netherlands!

the inevitable....!

2008-10-16T13:47:00.000-07:00

SKIP TO 2:45 mark and enjoy!

Thanks to Graydon.

Bitty...for real

2008-10-11T12:51:00.000-07:00

oh, and God is real too!

2008-10-10T17:22:00.000-07:00

Leprechauns are REAL!

2008-10-10T17:17:00.000-07:00

over-dubbing GI Joe

2008-10-07T13:39:00.000-07:00

Expect some Overdubbing from yours truly in the next little while. In the meantime..

Mesmerizing, the facial flex

2008-10-07T13:23:00.000-07:00

(thanks Adrienne)

Politics and pricks

2008-09-14T19:03:00.000-07:00

I know it may seem ridiculous for me to post videos about politics, considering my last post was a kitty queefing - however! I don't know WHO views this blog, but I like to think it is people who give a shit about the upcoming elections in Canada and the U.S.
That being said it's also a forum to share things with people they may have otherwise missed. So here it is.
Janeane Garofalo has become an increasingly relevant and respected mouthpiece for the Democrats. I am with the majority in being turned off by actors and musicians who make political statements in order to get attention, but judging by her fledgling acting career she is certainly not benefiting financially from her political endeavors. She is engaging, incredibly well informed and most importantly passionate about the things every decent person cares about.
Recently she was a panelist on the Bill Maher show along with Salman Rushdie and douchebag writer John Fund. Here is a clip from the show (which can be seen in it's entirety along with a short visit from Roseanne Barr on youtube)

kitty queef!

2008-09-07T14:41:00.001-07:00

Earth Extremists!

2008-09-07T14:34:00.000-07:00

Melodrama!

oh no

2008-08-24T21:51:00.000-07:00

this had me laughing (again, probably not so much were I not stoned)

It's Hilary first video so 'be nice' in the comments. Thanks.

another future gay on his way!

2008-08-24T21:33:00.000-07:00

Lovely little fella does his best Mariah impersonation (definitely a future American Idol contestant!)

(don't go read the incredibly ignorant responses to this video from the douchebag viewers of ebaumsworld here

fun times for all y'all

2008-08-24T21:25:00.001-07:00

I've gotten some slack for recent posts on here, so in response to my questionable character here are some videos we all will appreciate (especially under the influence of mary j). Some genius called SailorsPlayhouse on youtube has taken some of the worst, weirdest and waajdlksfjnvaowien movies ever made and removed all the least interesting parts and left the best for us to watch. To better understand please enjoy the following clip from Mannequin 2 (yes, a remake of the original Mannequin which made Kim Cattral from Sex and the Clitty a b-list celebrity).

(my favorite part is when Count Hunchenpretzel is greeted at the airport by the fumbling fat man who can't look past his hairy mole! there were a lot of scenes involving hairy moles in eighties movies weren't there?)

And this clip from the film Reform School Girls starring the late, great Wendy O'Williams from the seminal shock rock band The Plasmatics.

This lady can't keep her fingers out her cooch

2008-08-18T22:28:00.000-07:00

We've come a long way, baby.

2008-08-03T15:37:00.001-07:00

The infamous 1941 banned cartoon by Walter Lantz (creator of Woody Woodpecker.) Salvaged from poor quality copies and digitally restored for Historical and Educational purposes.

really bad PSA about child abuse

2008-07-30T14:05:00.000-07:00

This creepy old diddler keeps finding creative ways for the little boy to take his clothes off in this Kids Network Public Service announcement to prevent diddling.

WARNING - not for the faint of heart 2.

2008-07-30T13:36:00.000-07:00

Man dies on LIVE television

WARNING - not for the faint of heart!

2008-07-29T15:22:00.001-07:00

microphone gets rammed into mouth! uuuugh!

Best of YouTube CRAZY LADIES PT2.

2008-07-29T14:11:00.000-07:00

of course the CAT LADY!

mexican rant!

"fuck you, fuck you in the ass!" (gets good at about 2:08)

woman pretends to be hit by car!

SLOWED DOWN LAUGH

2008-07-29T13:55:00.000-07:00

HILARIOUS! I can't get enough.

via Graydon at OMGBLOG

The Addiction (1995)

2008-07-28T11:24:00.000-07:00

I first saw The Addiction when I was fifteen years old. My much cooler, older friend and I rented it from the local video shop and watched it in the basement of her parents house, stoned and enthralled. I never forgot it and desperately sought it out as an adult. It took me years to find a copy! No video store had it in stock, or even in their database. Finally, I found a used copy on EBAY.

It's been over ten years since it's release and the film has still not been released on DVD. It's pretty rare that a film doesn't make it to DVD, and pretty shocking this particular film hasn't - considering you can find the entire film catalog of some piece of shit like Lou Diamond Phillips on DVD.

What is even more fascinating about this film is the strong reactions and notoriety the film receives to this day from people who have seen it. There were no mixed reviews upon it's release, it was either loved or loathed.

D.I.Y cult director Abel Ferrara's career has been met with as much extreme reactions as this film. He made his name with cult classics Driller Killer, Ms.45, Bad Lieutenant and King of New York. He is also responsible for some real duds like Madonna's Body of Evidence.

Powerhouse Lili Taylor (I Shot Andy Warhol) plays Kathleen Conklin, a moody grad student who gets attacked and bitten by a vampire, then goes on a downward spiral of addiction and depravity.

For an excellent and detailed synopsis of the film go here

If you can see past the often unapologetically pretentious script, and the soundtrack which often misfires - it's a brilliant film.

Here are a few selected clips from the film that someone just recently put on youtube. If you haven't already seen the film - first you'll have to find it, and then dust off the ol' VCR.

Kathleen confronts friend (Edie Falco) after going through some sickening "changes"

NSFW
Kathleen preys upon a young girl

Kathleen meets an ancient vampire, Peina (Walken)

crazy ghetto bitch

2008-07-04T09:20:00.001-07:00

goes nuts on public transit (it's pretty infamous on the web now and there are even parodies of it now)

dirty drunk old slut

2008-07-04T09:06:00.000-07:00

this guy captures the antics of a wasted, trashy ol broad making a slutty fool of herself at a bar. GROSS!!!!

OH DIANE

2008-07-02T15:15:00.001-07:00

old classic

2008-07-02T15:11:00.000-07:00

That some of you may not have seen. A little girl (with Down Syndrome) learns about her period for the first time.

cuteness comeback

2008-07-02T14:21:00.000-07:00

This woman has trained her cat to eat with a fork, spoon and chopsticks!
(the best parts are when she is washing kitties paws with song, and tells us kitties dreams in life)

2008-06-18T23:13:00.001-07:00

dear friends

2008-06-09T14:38:00.000-07:00

I apologize for not updating for over a MONTH! I am still alive - just been busy. Expect updates very shortly. xoxo

Amy Sedaris as a talking penis...

2008-05-06T22:14:00.001-07:00

don't tease fatty

2008-05-03T22:03:00.000-07:00

balls for days

2008-05-03T22:00:00.000-07:00

LOVELY SISTER

2008-04-19T13:22:00.001-07:00

LIVE QUEEF

2008-04-16T18:59:00.001-07:00

TURN UP YOUR VOLUME TO REALLY ENJOY THE QUEEF

CAUTION CAUTION CAUTION CAUTION THE NEXT VIDEO IS NOT FOR THE QUEEF PHOBIC
(my best friend has urged me not to post this clip but I can't resist but share it with you)

SQUEEZE JAPANESE STYLE

2008-04-16T18:51:00.000-07:00

glumbert - Rush Hour Squeeze

via Frank at OMGBLOG

legendary clip

2008-04-16T18:44:00.000-07:00

I thought everyone in the world had seen this clip but my best friend hasn't so maybe some of you have been under a rock too. Here it is, the legendary Grape Stomper Fall.

I never tire of this clip

2008-04-15T20:43:00.000-07:00

I always hated that show Frasier, both Kelsey Grammer and that wincing blowhard David Hyde Pierce always got under my skin. In light of Mr. Grammer being on Letterman tonight I thought I would watch/post this clip of him humiliating himself by falling off stage while giving some useless lecture, instead of tuning into my beloved Dave.

(I love the slow, creeping approach of the gaggle of assistants - and the absolute SILENCE of the lecture hall)

NOSTALGIA

2008-04-07T20:58:00.000-07:00

Muffy was my favorite of course (F A G). I wanted to live in her little mouse hole that was decorated in pink silk and cozy mouse shit. She was the one that gave Alex life you know. She liked to rhyme too.
Sam the security guard always creeped me out with his french-fry hair. If you are over 25 I recommend getting stoned and watching clips of these old shows. Suddenly you start craving your Teddy Ruxpin and uncontrollably piss your bed.

hot tranny mess- fierce!

2008-04-03T14:05:00.000-07:00

short film worth watching

2008-03-25T15:28:00.000-07:00

This short film was in high circulation on the net last year, but just in case you missed it - here it is. It really is worth watching. Rabbit by Run Wrake:

the return of mr. bigmouth

2008-03-25T15:15:00.001-07:00

Metal Dog

2008-03-25T15:10:00.001-07:00

So weird!

did you miss me fuckers

2008-03-22T17:00:00.000-07:00

Sorry for not posting in a dogs age... but my life was temporarily ruined by tea bagging and having a banana shoved up my arse, actually that didn't happen to me - it happened to this DUDE!

Schramms Rock n' Roll Couples best performances PT1

2008-03-04T01:53:00.000-08:00

Siouxsie and Budgie (The Creatures) performing Exterminating Angel at Glastonbury. Siouxsie and Budgie were married for more than 15 years from 1981 to 2007. Budgie is arguably one of the most enigmatic drummers in the history of Rock n' roll - but his excitement to perform with Siouxsie at Glastonbury is clear at the height and soon (fall) of The Creatures is clear. I bet this was so much fun for both of them.

Ivy Rorsrach and Lux Interior in the video for The Cramps "Like a Bad Girl Should". They didn't hire bimbo extra's, eternally sexy redhead diva Ivy stars in this video and it's obvious how much passion and lust Lux has for his bride. Not by any stretch of the imagination the best Cramps' song, but a really romantic testament to how much they love one another. She is his ultimate video sex icon.

Polly Jean and Nick Cave performing 'Henry Lee' on British Television. You can sense the mutual affection and admiration. This song and video lives on as romantic legend of two of the most enigmatic and influential performers of the past twenty years who have both led admirable careers with no signs of slowing down or getting boring. What a great romance this could have been from a voyeurs perspective. However Nick Cave's shameless revenge dating and collaborating with someone as clearly vapid as Kylie Minogue left PJ with nothing more to say than to question whether Kylie is a person or not "Is that a person?". Testament that most SMART straight guys pray for a girl as smart as them, but when they get them, they can't handle it and find comfort in being with someone less intelligent. Anyway, he is said to be the "man" that broke Pj's heart. But if you ask me she easily outshadows him in this song and almost everything he has done since the Birthday Party, but....

When you are one half of the most influential American post-punk band in the world, and you have ovaries you get second billing by the mainstream press. Husband Thurston Moore was behind his wife in ensuring she got the credit she deserved as a worthy contributor and founder of the legendary Sonic Youth. Kim Gordon and Thurston Moore don't like Courtney Love (anymore). This video is a great example of their love because Thurston (and Kim herself) have always made sure Kim was given equal credit as a songwriter - and this song in particular really made her stand out amongst nineties kids as more than just an element of Sonic Youth but an equal to Thurston as the leader(s) of the band. In this video she incorporates her then protege (Bikini Kills) Kathleen Hanna and once again takes over songwriting credit AND stars in the video for the legendary 'Bull in the Heather'. Kim gets to star with her shameless protege, AND make fun of the 'sell-out' Courtney .

Kurt and Courtney performing Pennyroyal Tea in 1993. One of Rock's most influential couples and there is still no (easy to fin d online) video of them performing together. Instead here is an audio clip of the two, with Courtney making it clear she is upstaged from the get-go saying "Why do you have a microphone on your guitar and I don't have one on mine?". I have never given any credit to any bogus "murder" conspiracy. I think they truly loved one another. If he had lived everyone would be hating on him as much as every other faded nineties hero and Courtney probably wouldn't be as lame as she is today. Here they are, together. I'll never forget the clip on MTV of Kurt saying Courtney was the best 'fuck' he'd ever had and showing the vicious scratch marks on his back. THAT's romance folks.

not a winner

2008-02-15T14:00:00.000-08:00

but one of my entries was a runner up in the 'Inappropriate Children's Book Cover Contest' at cracked.com.

Check it outhere

didn't make it (but I think are funnier)

Schramm's Women in Film PT 1.

2008-02-05T18:44:00.000-08:00

I like my villains over the top, and dirty.

Best Villainess

Amanda Donohoe in Ken Russell's camp masterpiece, Lair of the White Worm. She plays the immortal Lady Sylvia Marsh. A snakewoman hell bent on the resurrection of the snake god she worships. I find it really fascinating Amanda Donohoe never had an interesting role before or after this film - in a way that makes this performance even better and more memorable. Amanda was the long time girlfriend of Adam Ant and is an outspoken atheist and feminist.

Diane Thorn in Ilsa She-Wolf of the S.S

creeps

2008-01-25T17:18:00.000-08:00

I know it's really uncool to post American Idol clips but these characters are really worth watching. Equal parts, sad, creepy and funny.

OMG "I'm gonna go for actressing" and the tongue action at the end.

SMACKFEST!

2008-01-17T15:52:00.001-08:00

(the girl ones are more fun)

(the FAT girl ones even better)

(funnily enough there is a video out there somewhere of me doing the SAME thing with a leather glove with my old roomate, I'd love to get my hands on it)

WTF. Addictive bizzare adorable Japanese commercial.

2008-01-10T08:34:00.000-08:00

THANK YOU MY FRIENDS!

IGNORED!

hahaha.

cats cats cats

2008-01-07T21:43:00.001-08:00

fat lazy human impersonating cat

my life would be so much better if my cats would let me do this to them

cute sleeper

swimming cat with a dog best friend = rules!

bongo man open WIDE

2008-01-07T21:37:00.000-08:00

crazy old man

2008-01-07T21:22:00.000-08:00

oh my god

2008-01-07T18:40:00.001-08:00

WELCOME TO MY HOME!

2008-01-06T22:31:00.001-08:00

Best on Saturday Night Live

2008-01-06T22:14:00.000-08:00

Currently, well it's always up and down and the last 30 min. have pretty much always sucked, but Penelope is the best character on SNL.

I am too stoned to figure out how to put the videos on my blog but here is the direct link. ENJOY!

my husband don't even stand a chance...

2008-01-06T22:11:00.001-08:00

i'm stoned and this made me laugh a lot

2008-01-06T21:56:00.001-08:00

Christopher Hitchens is the Keith Richards of the athiest academe

2008-01-03T22:39:00.000-08:00

this shit can't write itself....

2008-01-03T21:58:00.000-08:00

I first came across Ted Haggard the Evangelical in Richard Dawkins BBC series "The Root of all Evil" and was somehow not amazed or surprised he was involved in a gay scandal. It's not a strange coincidence or some phenomenon so many Evangelicals and Christian hardheads are invovlved in gay scandals. If it doesn't make you more of an athiest you are an idiot.

Here is the clip of Ted Haggard (a long time Prince of the NAE, admitting he bought meth from a gay prostitute after being referred to him for a 'massage'. Just look at the look on his WIFE's face during this clip. I don't feel sorry for her but she represents the kind of blind ignorance of other NAE members and religious right.
--------------clip info
Bush associate Ted Haggard, President of the National Association of Evangelicals (NAE), admits buying Meth from a homosexual prostitute to a KUSA-TV reporter. Says he called him for a "massage" but did neither use the drug nor have sex with the man.

Liz and her tears.

2008-01-03T20:43:00.000-08:00

thanks Amanda.

2008

2008-01-03T08:51:00.000-08:00

Somethin's Stinky

2007-12-03T16:51:00.000-08:00

Riddled with Reality Television, once in awhile a truly despicable and thoroughly memorable REALItY is captured. Like the infamous, and now deceased God Warrior from Trading Spouses and so on. However I remember one moment that everyone but me seems to have missed, and it's totally cringe worthy and humiliating on a level that is hard to even comprehend.

The moment is from Flavor of Love (Flavor Flav's awful reality show in which he tickles the pink of the a bunch of nasty bitches, who are competing for his 'love'. The winning spot is then awarded to the gross bitch who can pretend to stomach his nasty ass for the longest amount of time). All of the female contestants are given really absurd nicknames like Deelishus and Bootz. However this moment revolves around one REAL nasty bitch who goes by 'Somethin'. During a scene where all the girls are toasting some bullshit with Flav, Somethin' can't hold in her KFC (w/Sprite no ice) and drops a big TURD on the floor. You can see her lift up her dress and squat int he following clip. Then she rushes up the stairs to the washroom, leaving more turds behind her for the others to discover.

It was REALLY hard to find this clip.

Before Courtney...there was Farah..

2007-11-22T20:32:00.000-08:00

Before Courtney's nauseating appearance on Letterman a few years ago.. there was another trashed blonde making a fool of herself on his show. Farah Fawcett promoting her Xrated body painting Playboy video. I remember seeing this episode when it aired, and since Youtube came about..hoping it would appear on someday. Finally it has!

Famous rich blondes really DO get the best drugs.

Best moment is in clip 2, when Farah thinks the obviously fake N.Y city backdrop on Lettermans set is real.

46 year old calcified baby, removed from woman.

2007-11-21T18:56:00.000-08:00

video of treeman

2007-11-21T18:53:00.001-08:00

in the spirit of bad shape

2007-11-17T19:59:00.000-08:00

Perhaps you are aware of the phenomenon perhaps you aren't..

It all started during lunch break at my College. A group of kids were huddled around a laptop awaiting to watch a video their friend was insistent on showing them. The reaction was a unanimous combination of gags, yelps, screams and absolute repulsion.

It turns out MANY people have filmed their friends etc. reactions to watching this horrible video and put them up, the reactions are great to watch.

The video in question will NOT be posted or linked here, but the website devoted to the filmed reactions of innocent victims tricked into watching it.

I suggest if you decide to investigate further the 'video' these people are watching you prepare yourself. It is worse than tub girl (the first internet gross out phenomenon).

The videos of peoples reactions is the amusing part, the video is NOT amusing.

the following link IS SAFE don't worry it's not the link to the gross video, but only peoples reactions to it.

SAFE REACTIONS videos

hehehe pug pee

2007-11-17T19:33:00.001-08:00

awww my cat use to do this as a kitten

2007-11-17T19:18:00.000-08:00

what a retard

2007-11-17T19:16:00.000-08:00

compilation of prank calls to public access television

2007-11-15T19:25:00.000-08:00

maybe you already know about Koko the Gorilla

2007-11-11T19:27:00.000-08:00

but if not..watch this. Ignore miss Ching Hai and annoying host and subtitles. Koko rules. She says she loves Reggae music and romantic movies. It's a lot to watch but if you're a geek like me you'll like Koko and her brother Michael.

never tell a lie!

2007-11-06T18:27:00.001-08:00

awesome cartoon about mormons

2007-11-06T18:20:00.000-08:00

check out the black 'neutrals' hehehe

creepy kids show

2007-11-06T18:12:00.001-08:00

Amy Sedaris in Wonder Showzen

2007-11-02T22:46:00.001-07:00

from me and my imovie to you..

2007-10-30T20:49:00.000-07:00

Progeria

2007-10-29T22:12:00.000-07:00

Progeria is a very strange, sad disease. It occurs in one in four million births. Essentially it is known as 'rapid aging disease' wherein the lifespan is usually 10-12 years old, and the body ages at a rapid pace (ie. 12 equals 80 yrs old).

awful song, but Hayley is so cute.

Hayley

LLIK YOUR IDOLS

2007-10-18T21:29:00.000-07:00

Screamin' Jay Hawkins

2007-10-14T18:43:00.001-07:00

A short clip from a documentary (I'm trying to get a hold of) about one of the most enigmatic and groundbreaking artists in music history.

Sarah Silverman should die!

2007-10-14T18:29:00.000-07:00

He is so tragic. Chris Crocker was something else sure, but this is guy is so sad.

Here is one of my favorite scenes in S.S season 1.

Top Ten Rock n'Roll couples according to Schramm

2007-10-05T19:14:00.000-07:00

I have been thinking alot lately about the greatest rock n'roll couples of all time. Yeah these are the things that go on in my tiny little brain. The only rule is that they both have to be awesome and they both have to have to be musicians in their own right.

So here goes, from great (10) to greatest (1)

10. John Lennon and Yoko Ono

Sure might be a boring predictable choice, but the reality is they were in mad love. He was without a doubt awesome, and she is pretty strange and wonderful herself. She seduces him enough to leave the Beatles and pursue his own music career, they wax poetic and get policital, make babies, take drugs and write weird poetry, he is tragically killed and she goes on as the most hated woman in America and makes a strange and controversial music career for herself. All the while Yoko has maintained the legacy of John Lennon with a cool and mysterious grace.

9. Lou Reed and Nico

They would without a doubt be higher on the list had it been more than a fling. Lou Reed, while one of the most pompous legends of Rock n'Roll is still intriguing to even the most hard assed music snob. He's seen it all and done it all. Metal Machine Music? seriously. Nico is without a doubt one of the most tragic figures in the history of Rock N'Roll. A stunning beauty with the world wrapped around her finger, who wants nothing more than to destroy herself.

8. Kurt and Courtney
Say what you will, another predictable and perhaps tired choice. But fuck you it's Kurt and Courtney. As if most of the people from my generation didn't idolize either one of them in the early nineties, or maybe even both. I believe they were madly in love. They really seemed meant for one another. After Kurts untimely suicide there were two schools of thought on Courtney. One, that she is a beligerent harpy that milked her husbands death in order to gain fame and success (some idiots even believe that she killed him), the other is that she is someone with a frightening determination to succeed, even the death of her one true love wouldn't get in the way of her dreams. I tend to lean towards the latter, until about 1998 anyway. The real tragedy left behind from this romance lies in past ten years. Courtney really lost it. She had to sell part of the Cobain legacy to pay legal bills and put food on the table. She went from being an intriguing and confusing Rock n'Roll icon to a total mess. She is without a doubt second to Yoko as the most hated widow in America and the past ten years she has done nothing but make it seem rightly so.

7. Patti Smith and Tom Verlane

It might have been brief as well but what a couple. Patti Smith the godmother of Punk and Tom Verlaine of Television. Patti Smith claimed she didn't mind being domestic for Tom Verlaine and washing his clothes. I can't imagine she says that about many men. Tom may have turned out gay, but they are still close friends and have collaborated musically together. Two great, amazing legends who shared intimacy and romance and remain friends. Pretty awesome.

6. Nancy Sinatra and Lee Hazelwood

Some say it happened some say it didn't. The fact is these two worked together extensively creating some of the greatest duets of all time. Lee saw in Nancy everything that she became and helped make her into a star. A star in his own right he continued to produce for her and they toured extensively together. They were said to be friends (and lovers?) until his death this past August.

5. Johnny Cash and June Carter

Maybe another boring choice? but fuck you. One of the most romantic long term relationships I can think of. She had a great voice and spirit, and he..well he is Johnny Cash. He, every mans man, a genius outsider, a true rebel... in black, begged for her hand in marriage and they stayed together until her death. He didn't last much longer without her and those closest to him claimed that he couldn't go on without her. Now that is love.

4. Ike and Tina.

Sure it may have gone sour, but they were without a doubt one of the most enigmatic and amazing couples of the 60's. She found him as a teenager and he helped her become a huge star. Yeah it got sour, but I dare you to go on youtube and look up Ike and Tina performing and not be blown away. These two were not only in mad love but made mad amazing songs together.

3. Kim Gordon and Thurston Moore

They have been married for over twenty years and have remained the quintessential couple for every disaffected, socially inept, genius art kid who knows who Sonic Youth are. They are so incredibly private about their romance it was hard to even find a picture of them together on google image search. I admire them both greatly for their contributions to art and music, and hope to one day have what I imagine they have with one another. A mutual respect and admiration for one anothers, and a true and devoted love. Rock Royalty. Prince and Princess to my number one.

2. Nick Cave and Polly Jean Harvey

The only couple (although short term) on this list who could pass for brother and sister, Nick and P.J remain one of the greatest Rock n'Roll romances of the nineties. And for me, an obsession. Both of them are indisputably two of the most critically acclaimed contemporary musicians in Rock today and they shared not only a tumultous romance, but several great collaborations. They are both incredibly private and mysterious, brooding and self involved. It didn't work because they both need someone to lighten them up. That being said, they are almost my favorite. Listen to Henry Lee and tell me they don't deserve the number 2 spot.

1. .............................................................................................................................................................................................................Lux Interior and Ivy Rorschach

My number one, without a doubt. In the late seventies Lux (Erick Purkhiser), the rebellious outsider (in black leather I imagine) picks up Ivy (Kristy Wallace) the busty nomad teenager on his motorbike and they ride off into the sunset together. Together they form the greatest rock n'roll band of all time, The Cramps. They still live together in some weird house in the California desert, full of taxidermy, guitars and plush sofas. For me it doesn't get much better than that.

BET is good for one thing.. Bruce Bruce

2007-10-05T17:14:00.000-07:00

Just wait until the retarded kid and the Mom/Firetruck bits..
PT 1
PT 2

The point of my bad shape blog

2007-10-05T16:45:00.000-07:00

........was to share videos and things I found on the world wide web that I found amusing, and/or disturbing and that I wanted to share with friends (and strangers too I guess). However, being in school full time, moving, narcolepsy, my addictions to sex (including necrophelia, scatty and beastie), alcohol, marijuana, prescription medication, ludes, (toe) nail biting, hair pulling (out), cable television, black people and dogfights - I haven't found time to search the net and find worthy videos and things to put up here.

So instead I am just gonna post whatever the fuck I want. In order to keep your need for bad shape somewhat satisified.

I'm the online zit that you wanna pop.

creepy masks/faces

2007-09-15T18:10:00.000-07:00

fun fun animals

2007-09-11T15:46:00.000-07:00

this kitty is HUNGRY!

dog loves squirrels

2007-08-29T23:13:00.000-07:00

I'd be a bear too - Special Poetry Slam

2007-08-13T20:58:00.001-07:00